aprilstarchild | (no subject)

Right now I'm reading Overqualified, a collection of fictional cover letters. It's not only apropos to my current situation, it's fucking hilarious.

So far this one is my favorite:

To: Human Resources, Credico
Re: Sales

Hello, I am writing to apply for the position of Sales Rep with your company Credico! I'm located in the city of Halifax, where your ad says that you are currently recruiting, and I am including my resume for your review. My resume details my experience in sales, and I assure you that I am the person for this position.

Sometimes I think dent resistant side panels on a car are a waste of money, but then I remember that ladies be always throwing themselves at my car, and titties can wreak havoc on a paint job.

When it's warm, women like to take their titties out for a walk. You never see them in the winter, but in the hot months I guess their titties just start scratching at the door and yowling, and they need to be appeased.

Titties can be like rabid fucking animals, man. They claw at the carpet and they tear shirts down to the navel.

TITTIES TITTES TITTIES.

FUCK.

Yours,

Joey Comeau

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Coraline: 7:50pm Wednesday
Regal Pioneer Place Stadium 6
340 SW Morrison Street, Portland, OR

Is it the 3d version? I've been meaning to look, but the last time I did, Lloyd 10 had it. They're only going to have that version out for another week or so.

shoot! forgot to check

Lloyd Ctr is the only close one that has it

Yeah, the closest the 3d version is showing is Lloyd 10, after that it's Milwaukie and Clackamas and Tigard.

There it's 7:45 and 10:20.

I've heard really good things about that version--it's not so much that things jump out at you (which feels gimmicky), it feels like the screen has depth.

YOU HAVE TO SEE IT IN 3D!!! The effects are really nice and compliment the surreality of the other world.

BBWWAHAHAHA! Oh man that's great! *oh wipes away laugh induced tear* I love how althought they're fictional it starts out as realistic, not wonderfully written, but seems to be something an employer might see, and then curves into the hilirious! Titties! XD.

Hayley ^_^

Edited 2009-02-19 21:10 (UTC)

TITTIES TITTIES TITTIES

FUCK

Yeah, I laughed so hard it was hard to type!